We all have had those moments that were life-changing, those words of wisdom that just stuck and truly impacted us, and over the last several years or so I have had many, and I just want to share them with you. These words of advice, thoughts, and ideas have come in all forms and from all kinds, some from others, some from my own insights, but each of these have had a significant impact on me, not because of the power of the words but because of what I was able to do afterward. These are 12 nuggets of advice that have changed my life.
This is just one moment among many moments in your life right now.
I would get so caught up in the mistakes, things I did or didn’t do or the feelings I was having. Time never stops and all things pass, no matter where you are right now it will soon be over.
When something stinks, step back and make sure it’s not you who smells.
We all want to blame others for what we did or didn’t do ourselves; it takes a far bigger person to admit when they are wrong than it does to point the finger.
Kill em’ with kindness.
When in doubt, you can’t argue with kindness.
You have everything you need right now.
I used to hate this saying, but wherever you are right now you are fully equipped to tackle it, just check to make sure you are using all that is available to you.
You can’t change everyone else you can only change yourself.
If you want others to change, be the example first.
Always be willing to have the hard conversations.
Any time I have ever had to have a difficult conversation, and actually had the courage to have it without getting in the way, the outcome has always been for the better.
Never be afraid to be honest, you can’t control how others receive your truth.
We typically fear the truth because we worry about what will happen after, but cleaning up a lie is way more work, because you don’t have to clean up the truth.
One thing at a time.
We want it and want it now, except we first need to enjoy what we have right now.
Life gives you exactly what you need.
Because where you are is exactly where you need to be in order to get where you are going.
Never be afraid to be who you are, as long as you do it in an honest way.
It’s one thing to be you and do it with a thorn in your side, it’s another to do it in a way that encourages others.
Don’t take shit from anyone.
Those that give you shit probably don’t want to deal with their own, press on my friend.
You can change anything at any time, just be ready to deal with the consequences.
We can change anything and not all consequences are bad, many can and are good, but you won’t know any of that until you get up and do something.
As each year passes, I think to myself, how can I be better than I was before? Trying to live in my truth and live the life I want to rather than the life I think others need me to live.
The older I get and the more I experience life and speak my truth, the more I realize that I don’t have any time to waste living in a way that no longer serves me, and sometimes that means radical change, sometimes that means I can finally speak up in a way I never did before, sometimes that simply means that I live and act without fear.
I have watched far too many people, some very dear to my heart, live their lives in fear, and because of that they never went after what they desired or what they felt that life was asking them to. I have watched many make excuses as to why they made and are currently making the choices they are; but in the end, sadly, I dismay that they will not get where they are going because they simply won’t allow themselves the right to live boldly, in their own truth, because they fear what will happen to those around them and to themselves as they step into their own light.
I refuse to live that way and although I don’t know exactly where life will take me, I know where I am right now and have cultivated enough wisdom and honesty to step back and fully take advantage of the situations in front of me because although I do believe that life gives you exactly what you need, it’s your choice what you decide to do with it.
With that, I welcome the new year and hope that 2021 provides us with new hope and that we live our best lives and stay true to our true selves.
As you may or may not know, I’ve spent most of my life struggling. Struggling to survive. I survived an eating disorder, a laundry list of addictions, and the loss of a child. My journey to reach the place where I am at today hasn’t been easy. It took a lot of hard work and I met some amazing people that helped me to find a purpose in my everyday life. Thanks to the people who helped me, I am blessed to now be able to help others by offering a coaching program, Practices for a Positive and Productive Life.
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If I can go from a walking corpse, stricken with a deadly eating disorder, to a healthy mom of four, I can only imagine what is in store for you.
Happy New Year! It’s an opportunity we get every 365 days. What a great feeling! A new year, a new perspective, and a fresh start.
As a new year begins, many people make resolutions in an effort to better themselves. However, I don’t necessarily like resolutions. Resolutions tend to set people up for disappointment. So, instead of making resolutions again this year, set goals.
To be honest, I’ve never used to spend time to sit down and set goals for myself. Of course, I always had an “idea” of what I wanted to do each year but that’s pretty much it. So, when I sat down to write out my personal and professional goals for next year, I realized that I had NO idea how to do it. What was I supposed to do? What was the point? None. However, it’s something that I needed to figure it out and figure out quick.
Enter, John Maxwell.
John Maxwell is the New York Times bestselling author of How Successful People Think. In his book, Maxwell’s advice really hit home. He encourages people to be “big-picture thinkers.” Big picture thinkers keep broader, bottom-line goals in mind no matter what the task is and no matter how big or small it is. He states that “the purpose of a goal is to focus your attention and give direction, not to identify a final destination.” Finally, something that makes sense! Set smaller goals to reach your bigger goal–GENIUS!
So, as I sit down to set my goals for the new year, I now have a plan. My smaller goals will allow me to reach my bigger goals. I have my goals written down and for the first time in forever– I know what I need to do and I know what I must do in order to get there. There is a lot less “I wonder” and “I hope” thoughts filling my head and to be honest, it feels good. I am approaching the new year with the confidence and tools that I need to be successful. What a great feeling.
Whether you are beginning a fitness routine, creating a better plan of attack for meal planning, or yes, tackling the task of running your own business–set goals, stay the path and remain mentally clear. You can do it!
Check out these 5 Tips on Setting REALISTIC Resolutions!
Here’s to an amazing New Year! Cheers!
It’s a yearly tradition to deal with broken promises to take better care of ourselves. Whether we planned to lose weight, adopt a new exercise routine, eat healthier, or eliminate a bad habit, we seem to repeatedly let ourselves down. The fact is, only about 20% of us keep our New Years Resolutions, most of which are in some way fitness-related.
Over the years, I have been notorious for bogus New Year’s goals.
Having spent most of my life as an addict, though, I’ve accumulated some stepping stones that have helped me keep on my path. I consider this realistic goal-setting for a healthy life. I urge you to see your resolutions in a new light.
Here are 5 Ways to Set Realistic New Years Resolutions:
1. Be realistic.
Be honest about what you are capable of achieving. As I tell my yoga students often, “It’s not about how many classes you should come to a week, but how many classes you think you can continue to come to without dropping off.” Your goal could be to stop eating after 9 p.m., and then in a month, it bumps up to 8 p.m. and so on. Changes should never be all or nothing. Give yourself grace by setting realistic expectations for yourself.
2. Don’t use the same resolution again.
Set a new goal. This is a new opportunity to do something great for yourself. If you struggled to achieve that goal last year, maybe it needs to be rethought.
I’m sure the same tape plays in all of our heads during the holidays: “I’m just going to eat and enjoy myself. After the New Year, my diet starts.” This line is used by countless people, but it means nothing. If you are going to eat chocolate throughout December, then own it! In the New Year, if you say you aren’t going to eat chocolate, then good luck. But if you have said this before, odds are the same cycle is going to repeat itself.
3. Let everyone know about your goals.
As an addict, I know that the more you keep things secret, the harder it is to attain your goals. Even things like weight loss, new food choices or exercise plans should be shared with an accountability partner, family, or friend. Working through recovery has taught me that the more people you have on your side and the fewer secrets you have, the more successful you become.
Are you too embarrassed? Own up and be proud that you have recognized a change you need to make. Don’t go at it alone. Ask people to hold you accountable. Odds are that they will be proud to be an inspiration and support system for you.
4. Just Drink (More Water, that is).
When the body and brain are dehydrated, we feel sluggish. We confuse hunger for thirst, and we don’t function as we should.
If you are partaking in a fitness-related resolution, I urge you to drink up. Try to drink at least half your body weight in ounces a day, as a starting point. I begin each morning with an eight-ounce glass of warm water with lemon essential oil.
5. Watch for Self-Sabotage.
We all claim that we don’t have time, are too tired or stressed, or don’t have the money. Well, walking outside is free, screen time can be exchanged for exercise time, and it’s possible that your eyes and mind are drowsy from constant staring at the computer screen. You may just need an exercise boost, or to get to bed a little bit earlier!
Call yourself out about all these excuses! Be honest, because from honesty, new things begin.
If you are considering working with a coach to help you achieve your goals, consider joining me in my Practices for a Positive and Productive Life Masterclass, starting in January 2020! We are offering a Beta Course, four months of coaching, for just $497 ($1,000 off original price).
Happy New Year!
Here are more New Year’s Resolution and Goal Setting Resources:
[FREE WORKSHEET] Stepping into the New Year with New Insights
Goal Getter: The #Last90Days of the Year
How to Get Out of a Rut
This article was originally published in Nature’s Pathways in January 2014.